Day 104 - The manly me I wish to be

How I want to be perceive by others as a manly man.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wish/want/desire to be perceive by others as a manly man that is tough, strong and not fearful.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define such man as superior and feel superior when I perceive myself this way and on the other hand to feel inferior when I do not perceive me this way.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think/believe/perceive being self-honest and open with others as weak and feel inferior in such situations.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being self-honest and open with others and to worry that others may react negatively.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself and feel inferior whenever others react negatively to my self-honesty and openness and to feel superior when other react positively to my self-honesty and openness.

Why I prevent myself from being more open and self-honest with others:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge my past and so to judge myself through my past and what I have done in the past. I realize and understand that judging myself for the past is pointless as it only creates the feeling of inferiority within me and is actually an excuse to not be here in the breath and take responsibility for what is here in the moment. I commit myself to no more accept and allow myself to judge my past and myself through my past, instead I take self-responsibility for what is here in the breath in awareness that there in no point to judge what is here in every moment because judgments are opinions of self-interest that are used as justifications for why not to be self-directive and self-responsible in the moment to do what is best for all in common sense.

Opinion:
noun
1. a belief or judgment that rests on grounds insufficient to produce complete certainty.
2. a personal view, attitude, or appraisal.
3. the formal expression of a professional judgment: to ask for a second medical opinion.
4. Law. the formal statement by a judge or court of the reasoning and the principles of law used inreaching a decision of a case.
5. a judgment or estimate of a person or thing with respect to character, merit, etc.: to forfeit someone's good opinion.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that opinions matter. I realize and understand that opinions are not facts and so do not matter, therefore I commit myself to not accept and allow myself to create opinions and to judge myself/others according to opinions, instead I consider facts and do what is best for all based on facts.

I see, realize and understand how not considering facts the way that is best for all but self-interested opinions, creates wars and abuse of life on Earth as it can now be seen in Syria.

Day 103 - Getting to know a woman

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wish/want/desire to meet and get to know women from the starting point of wanting sex, a partner, love and to feel superior.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel superior whenever I meet/get to know a woman and to feel inferior if I don't meet/get to know any women.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to decide who I want to meet/get to know according to their appearance and first impression. I realize and understand that judging people according to their appearance is abuse because I do not actually see and get to know the real living being that is behind the fake picture. When and as I see myself deciding to meet/not meet/get to know a person according to their image and/or first impression - I stop and breathe in awareness of the above realization. I commit myself that I will no longer do this, instead I will direct myself in breath to get to know all people equally, to not judge them and to see them for what they really are as life.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get excited to meet a woman that represents a systematic 'pretty picture' and to within this feel superior and on the other hand to feel inferior and create a resistance towards meeting a woman that does not represent a systematic 'pretty picture' or that is not systematically defined as 'desirable'. When I see this, I correct myself to not judge a woman according to her image or systematic definitions, instead I direct myself to get to know every woman for what she really is a life beyond her picture and system definitions, judgments, beliefs.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wish/want/desire to make a good impression when I meet a woman.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wish/want/desire that woman and other people would have a good opinion about me. I realize and understand that opinions and first impressions do not matter. What matters is what one does in every breath to bring about what is best for all life. Therefore I do not accept and allow myself to worry about how others think of me, how the perceive me and what first impression do I make to others. Instead I direct myself in breath and treat another as I would like to be treated.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give to women more attention than to men.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a wish/want/desire within me towards meeting women and on the other hand to create resistance in me towards meeting men. I realize and understand that I create abuse by favoring women over men and 'pretty' women over 'not pretty women', therefore I commit myself to immediately stop when and as I see myself doing this and I direct myself in breath to see everyone equally for what they are as life.