Day 22 - The Decision Character

Making decisions is something I am not effective at yet as I usually let something 'outside of me' to make decisions for me or just wait to see what happens and then just go along with it. When I am deciding I usually consider many things, but most of them are based on mind-fucks, such as my desire to please others/everyone, fears of loosing something, fears on loosing money and what others think/say/suggest, so in this I never really investigate for myself what is the best way to act/decide and I avoid taking complete self-responsibility for my decisions as I never really make decisions based on my self-direction but let other things to have influence on me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that I am not good at making decisions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to try and avoid making decisions for myself and taking complete self-responsibility for my decisions by just going along with what happens.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base my decisions on something 'outside' of myself and letting things happen, instead of directing myself in common sense and taking self-responsibility.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear making decisions and in this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will make the 'wrong' decision and later regret it.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not trust myself in making decisions and in this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish/want to rely and trust other's opinions and suggestions more than I trust myself in making decisions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that there are 'right'/'good' and 'wrong'/'bad' decisions and 'small'/'easy' and 'big'/'hard' decisions, instead of realizing that all decisions are equally just that - decisions - but with different consequences where some are proffered and others not.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that all decisions can be re-considered and re-aligned/corrected if and when I realize that their consequences are not preferred and not aligned with common sense and what is best for all and in this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that 'bigger' decisions are 'more serious' than 'smaller' decisions, instead of realizing that all decisions are equal within who I am when making them and within their consequential outflows.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make my decisions based on wish/want/desire to please others and make others happy and satisfied, instead of looking at practical common sense and what I would actually prefer doing here in the physical within the breath to support myself as an equal and consequently support others within developing common sense and working towards what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to make decisions based on what others say/think/believe/suggest by putting more value on the opinions of others and what others say. I realize that with this I make myself inferior to others where I don't take complete self-responsibility for myself and my decisions and don't completely stand as/live my decisions and so allow myself to be swayed and manipulated by others. When and as I see myself putting more value on the opinions of others when making my decisions and basing my decisions on what others say - I stop and I breathe. Instead I investigate for myself and inform myself as best as I can and make a decision based on common sense and self-honesty where I am able to stand by it and take self-responsibility for it within considering what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base my decisions on how others will react and in this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear others reactions to my decisions and to compromise my decisions out of fear of others reactions.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base my decision according to my feelings/emotions, instead of clearing myself to stand clear within the breath and making my decisions according to common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to base my decisions according to money and fear of losing money, instead of common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to value/compare decisions according to how I feel about them, instead of clearing myself from emotions/feelings/reactions and looking at them in common sense and what is practically best for all.

I commit myself to within making decisions - clear myself from reactions, fears, emotions/feelings through investigating the source of these mindfucks and removing/deleting them with self-forgiveness and self-correction.

I commit myself to base my decisions on self-honesty, common sense and what is best for all and not on fear, emotions/feelings, money and others reactions or opinions.

I commit myself to trust myself within my decisions and not take others opinions/suggestions as superior and so letting others decide for me.

Day 17 - I cannot concentrate character

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that I cannot concentrate if music is playing/people are talking or in the room. I realize that I use this to manipulate myself to not face myself and overcome the resistance. When and as I see myself thinking/believing/perceiving that I cannot concentrate if music is playing/people are talking or in the room - I stop and I breathe. Instead I direct myself in the breath and overcome the resistance by moving myself to face myself and do what I intended.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive there have to be certain conditions met before I can concentrate, like silence. I realize that I manipulate myself to avoid facing myself and doing what I intended. When and as I see myself thinking/believing/perceiving that there have to be certain conditions met before I can concentrate, like silence - I stop and I breathe. Instead I stop the mind/backchat with breathing and direct myself to face myself and do what I intended.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that concentration demands effort, instead of realizing that this is just an idea in my mind. When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that concentration demands effort - I stop and I breathe. Instead I direct myself here in the breath.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the thought/belief "I cannot concentrate right now" as an excuse to not face myself and push through the resistance. When and as I see myself use the thought/belief "I cannot concentrate right now" as an excuse to not face myself and direct myself - I stop and I breathe. Instead I breathe and direct myself.

I commit myself to no more manipulate/compromise myself by believing and thinking that I cannot concentrate in certain situations.

Day 14 - Farewell character

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into the farewell character whenever I say goodbye and part from people who I know and enjoy being with. When and as I see myself going into a farewell character - I stop and I breathe. Instead I stay here in the breath.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into sadness and to define/see/perceive the act/moment of parting from people as sad. When and as I see myself going into sadness when departing from people - I stop and I breathe. Instead I do SF on the trigger point and I stay here in the breath.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that parting from people who I know/like is more important/special than parting from anyone else and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define/see/perceive the people I know/like as more important/special than others. When and as I see myself seeing parting from people as important/special - I stop and I breathe. Instead I stay here in the breath and direct myself in common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to see/realize that I think/believe/perceive that parting from people who I know/like is more important/special because I have defined these people as 'more important' than other and gave them higher value in my mind than to other people. When and as I see myself defining some people as more important/special than others - I stop and I breathe. I realize that with this I create separation. Instead I stay here in the breath and stand equal to all Life here and regard everyone equally within what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into memories of what I experienced with the people I am parting from in the moment we part where I try to capture the experience and memorize it and give it a special value so that I could later remember it and re-experience it in my mind and then define myself through these memories. I realize that with this I enslave myself through memories and characters instead of simply being here in the breath and not defining myself through pictures/memories/feelings/emotions and instead just being here in the breath and directing myself in common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imagine what people I am parting from will do and where will they go after we part and then try to imagine what I will miss if/when I am not with them and then try to compare what I imagined my experience will be like from the moment of parting onward to what their experience will be like and then try to see which experience will be 'better' and then imagine others having 'better' experience and me having 'boring' experience and so go into sadness and the feeling of missing out, instead of realizing that I am within this continuing to limit/enslave myself to the idea of experience and chasing the 'perfect'/'best' experience from the perspective of feelings/emotions. When and as I see myself to imagine what people I am parting from will do and where will they go after we part - I stop and I breathe. Instead I stay here in the breath.

I forgive myself for not accepting and allowing myself to realize that when I find parting sad and uncomfortable I actually fear of loosing the experience that I have created with people I am parting from in terms of feelings/emotions/thoughts. I realize that I am still holding onto the wish/want/desire to have energetic experiences with people with which I limit and enslave myself and abuse self and others. When and as I see myself fearing of loosing the experience that I have created with people - I stop and I breath. Instead I stay here in the breath and apply self-forgiveness and self-corrections and direct myself here in the physical to not go into the mind back-chat and irrational fears but direct myself here in the breath.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish/want/desire to be with people from the starting point of having a great experience in terms of feelings/emotions so that I wouldn't miss out the 'great energetic fun' that I imagine others have when I am not with them. I realize that with this I still accept and allow myself to be directed/controlled by my own energetic experiences as feeling/emotions where I only focus on myself and my own experiences, instead of directing myself here in the breath in common sense and according to what is best for all. When and as I see myself wishing/wanting/desiring to be with people from the starting point of having a great energetic experience - I stop and I breathe. Instead I look at the starting point and use self-forgiveness and self-correction to stop and remove the energetic addictions and align myself accordign to what is best for all here in the physical.

I commit myself to stop and remove the farewell character with self-forgiveness and self-correction and I commit myself to stop defining people as more than/less than according to who I know and who don't.

I commit myself to stop and remove my addictions and wishes/wants/desires for energetic experiences and align myself according to practical common sense and what is best for all.

Day 13 - Gamer character

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define me as a gamer and think/believe/perceive that a gamer is who I actually really am, instead of realizing that this is just a character I created for myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel proud that I am good at playing games when someone is interested in my gamer character and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the gamer character as a way to define/compare myself to others and make myself feel 'more (special) than' others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use my gamer character and games as a way to escape the reality of this world where I forget about everything and focus only on my energetic experiences while playing a game where I look for/wish/want/desire to create feelings of excitement/adrenalin/adventure/accomplishment and be the winner, instead of stopping the energy addictions to feelings/emotions and being here in the breath as self-expression.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into excitement and memories whenever I think about playing games, instead of realizing that with this I support my energetic addiction to the positive feelings I create for myself while playing games.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to imagine/daydream about (playing) games game consoles in order to create the feeling of excitement in myself, instead of realizing that with this I continue my addiction to the feeling of excitement instead of being here in the breath and not accepting and allowing myself to go into backchat/daydreaming about games and game consoles.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into the gamer character whenever I imagine/see my computer/gaming console where I bring up the memories of experiences/feelings I have connected with them, instead of staying here in the breath and not accepting and allowing myself to go into memories/feelings.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish/want/desire to experience the excitement of playing/getting a new game/gaming console instead of realizing that I have to stop this energetic addiction through which I limit and abuse myself.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to create the feeling of excitement by watching pictures/movies of games/gaming consoles on the internet and imagining how I would play them/use them and how I would feel and thus already creating the feelings/experience of excitement as the gaming character in my mind, instead of stopping myself with breath and not going into feelings/wishes/wants and stopping the addiction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to look for satisfaction in games in the form of feelings of excitement, accomplishment and winning, instead of removing the energetic addictions of positive feelings and being satisfied with myself here in the physical in every breath as I move and direct myself within common sense and what is best for all.

I commit myself to stop my energetic addictions as the gamer character by using self-forgiveness and self-correction to stop myself and stay here in the breath, directing self within common sense and what is best for all Life.

Day 12 - Comedian character

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into a comedian character in order to bring myself and others into a happy mood. I realize that 'happy mood' is the polarity feeling of the 'unhappy mood' which are both feeling/emotions that I don't need at all in order to enjoy myself here in the physical. When and as I see myself wanting/wishing/desiring to be and bring others to 'happy mood' - I stop and I breathe. Instead I forgive myself for existing/going into the mind polarity of positive/negative feelings/emotions and simply stay here in the breath and enjoy moving/directing myself within/as the physical within common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that I use the comedian character to suppress the negative emotions I am in by changing them into positive feelings and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the comedian character as a suppression method so that I wouldn't have to face/deal/take responsibility for my negative emotions. When and as I see myself going into/being in a comedian character in order to suppress the negative emotions and create positive feelings - I stop and I breathe. Instead I investigate the cause of my negative emotions and I remove it with self-forgiveness and self-correction and I stay here in the breath and enjoy moving/directing myself within/as the physical within common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realize that I use the comedian character every time I feel embarrassed/'less than' as a defense mechanism to make fun out of myself where others can laugh at me and I see/perceive myself as the 'winner' as I can say that this was my intention, while I actually did that so that others wouldn't laugh about my embarrassment/inferiority because then I would feel even more embarrassed/inferior. When and as I see myself using the comedian character as a defense mechanism when I feel embarrassed/'less than' - I stop and I breathe. Instead I look at the point of embarrassment/feeling 'less than' and I remove the point with self-forgiveness and self-correction and I stay here in the breathe enjoying moving/directing myself within/as the physical within common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the comedian character to 'break the silence' when I am with people and nobody talks because I feel awkward as I am afraid that others will judge me when in fact I judge myself and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to feel awkward when I am silent when being with other people. When and as I see myself wanting to use the comedian character to 'break the silence' when I am with other people - I stop and I breathe. Instead I look at where do I judge myself for being silent and I remove the points with self-forgiveness and self-correction and stay here in the breathe enjoying moving/directing myself within/as the physical within common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into backchat of self-judgment when I am silent while with other people and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to judge/define/see/perceive myself as a boring, weird, stupid, lame, inferior, limited, mentally challenged, less than, unsocial, outsider, unaccepted, loner, loser, 'special in a bad way' person when I am silent with other people. When and as I see myself going into backchat judging myself when being silent with other people - I stop and I breathe. Instead I apply self-forgiveness and self correction for every point that comes up and I stay here in the breath and enjoy myself moving/directing myself here in the physical within common sense and what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to use the comedian character as a way to be accepted/liked by other people and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that I have to make myself be liked/accepted by other people instead of just me accepting/liking myself. When and as I see myself using the comedian character as a way to be accepted/liked by other people - I stop and I breathe. Instead I accept and like myself as Life here in thy physical as one and equal.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to hide behind laughter whenever I feel embarrassed or find something embarrassing. When and as I see myself hiding behind laughter when I feel embarrassed or find something embarrassing - I stop and I breathe. Instead I look at what is the cause of my embarrassment and I remove the point with self-forgiveness and self-correction.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to laugh at and make fun out of things I find unpractical/noncommonsensical and think/believe/perceive that I can do nothing about them. I realize that this is how I abdicate my self-responsibility towards standing as a solution. When and as I see myself laughing at and make fun out of things I find unpractical/noncommonsensical - I stop and I breathe. instead I investigate the point in common sense and find/pointing out/stand for practical solutions according to what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to see/define/perceive myself as a comedian/funny person and within this I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that being a comedian/funny person is a part of my personality as who I really am. I realize that a comedian/funny person character is just a character that I created for myself and does not define me as who I really am as Life here. When and as I see myself seeing/defining/perceiving myself through the comedian/funny person character/personality and thinking/believing that this is who I actually am - I stop and I breathe. Instead I stop defining/seeing myself as a comedian/funny character and stay here in the breath.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that my personality(-ies)/characters are me as who I really am, instead of realizing that I learned/created/adopted my characters/personalities that have nothing to do with who I actually really am as Life here, meaning I only make up/carry/hide behind characters/personalities in order to not have to face me and be self-responsible for who I actually really am as Life here in the physical in oneness and equality. When and as I see myself thinking/believing/perceiving that the character/personality I am in is actually who I really am - I stop and I breathe. Instead I observe and investigate how/why I have created the character I am in and I stop defining myself according to the character and remove it with self-forgiveness and self-correction and stay here in the breathe, enjoying directing myself withing/as the physical in common sense and according to what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to think/believe/perceive that others speak about me and who I really am when they judge/compare/define me/speak about me as a personality, while in fact they only speak about my characters/personalities and project their own characters/personalities onto me, meaning they don't actually speak/talk about who I really actually am here as Life in the physical, they only show me my characters/personalities and their character/personalities that are not real and can be removed. Therefore judging myself/others and their character/personalities is pointless and unnecessary as this characters/personalities do not represent beings as Life as who we really are, but only who we accepted and allowed ourselves to become through the illusion of the energy of the mind/feelings/emotions and so this characters/personalities can/will be removed by ourselves or by death and there is no point in waiting for death as then it is too late as we no longer actually exist here in the physical and Life can only actually exist here in the physical as the physical is superior to the mind and everything else in every way and so everything else is just an illusion that can end in any moment.

Therefore, instead of judging/comparing my character/personalities and those of others - I stop and I breathe. I commit myself to not judge/blame characters/personalities but stay here in the breath and stop and let go of my characters/personalities through writing, self-forgiveness, self-correction so that I can stand as the physical character in every breath and support others in removing their character so that we can all be/become Life here in the physical and live in common sense and according to what is best for all.

I commit myself to stop and let go of all my characters/personalities and to only accept and allow myself to be that what I really am as Life here in the physical in oneness and equality.

Day 10 - Being silent character

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define myself as a silent/quiet person. I realize that this is a character/personality I have created for myself out of fear of speaking to others and embarrassing myself or  being rejected and laughed at, so that I wouldn't have to take self-responsibility for my fears. When and as I see myself going into the 'being silent character/personality' - I stop and I breathe. Instead I stay in the breath and I commit myself to look at where am I still allowing myself to hide/compromise myself within the 'being quiet' character.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define being quite as smart/wise and connect it to the saying/belief that wise people don't speak. I realize that through this I try to justify my silence by trying to make myself feel more than others. When and as I see myself defining my silence as smart/wise through the belief that wise people don't speak - I stop and I breathe. Instead I do not compromise myself through silence and allow myself to speak and express myself in the breath.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to examine/judge/and compare myself while I speak. I realize that I do this because I am afraid of embarrassing myself. When and as I see myself being afraid that I will embarrass myself - I stop and I breathe. Instead I stay here in the breath and I do not judge/define myself as less than/more than no matter how others react.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to wish/want/desire to maintain/raise my value/reputation when I speak. I realize that only I give value to myself and that valuing self through others is pointless. When and as I see myself trying to maintain/raise my value/reputation when I speak - I stop and I breathe. Instead I accept myself as an equal here in every breath, before and as I speak.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will loose value if I say something stupid. I realize that I try to give value to myself through others whether they judge what I say as smart or stupid. When and as I see myself accepting and allowing myself to fear that I will loose value if I say something stupid - I stop and I breathe. Instead I accept myself as an equal before and as I speak and I speak common sense and what is best for all here in the breath.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into self-judgment and fear the moment before I speak. I realize that this is a pointless pattern of irrational fear I created from the belief that I can be less than others/ashamed and rejected if I say something 'wrong'. When and as I see myself going into self-judgment and fear before speaking - I stop and I breathe. I commit myself to not compromise myself anymore with silence when I want to speak and I do not judge myself but accept myself as an equal as I speak, no matter how others react.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to go into self-judgment/comparison and fear when I am in a group of people/strangers. I realize that I fear that I'll be rejected because I don't accept myself. When and as I see myself going into self-judgment/comparison and fear when I am in a group of people/strangers - I stop and I breathe. Instead I stay here in the breath and I accept myself as an equal no matter what others say about me and I realize that strangers do not exist because we all know each other as we see each other and everything else is of the mind and so no real because what is in the mind does not define us as who we are as Life here in the physical.