Day 56 - Perception of fun and living vs wasting one's life

Day 55 is in Slovene.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define living and being alive as having fun and within this to define not living and wasting ones life as not having fun, where I have defined 'having fun' as:

- meeting new people and having lots of friends
- doing activities together with friends, like sports, parties, travel, talking, playing games, going out, hanging around, exploring something new to do
- doing something that I define as interesting, exciting, exhilarating or where I experience myself as having a positive feeling while doing it

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define 'having fun' as meeting new people and having lots of friends and also to define wasting my life as being alone, not meeting people and having no friends. I realize that I am within this participating in an energetic polarity where I try to meet new people and have lots of friends in order to experience myself as 'having fun' and not wasting my life, instead of stopping to participate in this energetic pattern. I commit myself to stop defining and connecting 'having fun' and living as meeting new people and having lots of friends to hang with and to stop experiencing myself as 'not having fun' and wasting my life when I am not meeting new people and have no friends and to instead direct myself here in the breath to do what is best for all.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define 'having fun' as doing activities together with friends, like sports, parties, travel, talking, playing games, going out, hanging around and exploring something new to do and also on the flip side to define 'wasting my life' as being alone and not doing activities with friends, like parties, travel, talking, playing games and being inside and not going out, not hanging with friends and others and not finding something new to do. I realize that I am within this participating in a mind polarity where I would define certain activities and experiences as fun and connect them with living and not wasting ones life and others as not fun and would connect them with wasting one's life and would so experience myself as if I am wasting my life and start to live and be-lie-ve this experience, instead of realizing and understanding that while I am participating in this pattern of my mind/ego, I am actually missing what is important and actually real as life here in this physical reality. Therefore I commit myself to no more define Life and living as 'having fun' as I defined it and to stop participating in this pattern of wishing, wanting and desiring to 'have fun' and to instead actually focus on what is here in every moment and direct myself in breath and self-honesty and do what is best for all, so that we can fix this reality by stopping all the abuse and addiction to energy, emotions and feelings and create a world where all Life is supported equally so that we can all enjoy Life in the best way possible.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define 'having fun' as doing something that I define and experience as interesting, exciting, exhilarating or where I experience myself as having a positive feeling while doing it. I realize that within this I participate within an energetic polarity where I define certain activities as positive, interesting, exciting, exhilarating and others as negative and boring and so I try to avoid the latter, instead of stopping participating in the pattern and removing the energetic polarity experience of myself within this. I commit myself to no more define 'having fun' as doing something where I experience myself as being interested, excited and exhilarated, instead I remove all definitions and positive or negative energetic attachments to activities and direct myself here in the breath to do what is best for all Life, so that we can stop the abuse as soon as possible and create a world where all Life is supported equaly and in the best way possible.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to define and connect positive experiences and feelings with having fun and living and negative experiences and emotions with wasting my life and to within this try to avoid the latter instead of stopping the pattern of creating and participating the polarity energetic experiences within myself. I commit myself to all the patterns where I define experiences as positive or negative until I am always the same here in the breath, directing myself the way that is best for all Life.